In Need of Some Insight Today

I poured myself a bowl of Special K, added some milk and drizzled some honey over the flakes. Standing by my kitchen counter, I looked out the window on to our snowy back yard, and began to mechanically take in my breakfast, while I prayed, “Lord, I need some insight today.”

I then quietly moved around the house attending to some housekeeping issues.  With two children home from school for “post final exam renewal” I did not want to wake them, both for their sake, and truthfully, for mine. I need time.

I poured a Diet Coke over ice. A DC at 8:30 AM is a bit early for me, but I was up at 4:30 AM to work on the study I am writing and teaching on the Book of Acts and already polished off a half a pot of coffee. It was more like noon in my mind and I was ready for a change in beverage.

“Lord, I need some insight today. Some Holy Insight.”

I have been praying it all morning. My mind feels way to full with “other” things, and I am having a hard time focusing.  Writing this study is challenging, and although I love the process, it does not come easily. I know very little about the book of Acts. I am learning a lot. I am learning to trust more.

But today, I find myself sitting here, needing a serious dose of insight.  Looking for insight. Praying for insight.  Trusting God for insight.  Holy Insight.

It doesn’t always come easy. Sometimes it feels as if I have to wrestle it out of the Spirit (if that is even possible) and other times it just pops in to my mind. I guess there are no set rules for gaining insight.

But I am also realizing that there are some tools –

·         Opening my bible. I can’t learn and see the truth unless I am willing to look at what God says. Today I am studying the life of Stephen. Ah, yes, there is a lot of Holy Insight here.  I am sure of it.  I just need to see it.

·         Being obedient to what God has called me to do – not just in writing this lesson, but in being a wife, a mother, a friend, a writer. It is looking for Him as I move about in the day, asking Him to give me fresh insight through the circumstances around me -- even laundry and dishes.

·         Praying – that’s the seeing part, I am almost sure. Asking the Holy Spirit to reveal to me what He wants me to see.

That’s where my head is today. Nothing profound, really.  Just a need and prayer.

Maybe you are in need of insight today. Insight on what to do next. Insight on how to parent or on how to deal with a difficult situation in your marriage. Maybe you need insight in to what to write in a letter to a friend who needs hope. Maybe you need insight in to your own heart, where you are struggling to believe in God's promises and love for you.  

My encouragement to you, today, dear reader is to take a deep breath, open His Word and read,  be obedient to your calling and pray.  I believe that God is faithful to show up and show Himself to us in the way that we need to see – today. 

I am trusting Him in it for myself and I am trusting Him to do the same for you.

Hmmm ... I think I have an idea coming -- but to working on the study on Stephen ...

What To Do for a Friend in Great Need?

My heart is deeply burdened for a friend today. I cannot shake the vision of her face or the sorrow of her heart.  I feel helpless.  I want to do something, but am not sure what. A gift? A card? What can I do, Lord?

I went to my perfect parent, my Father in Heaven, and asked Him. He knows her heart. He knows her situation.  He knows her every need.

He reminded me of a time not so long ago.  I was the one who was in the deepest depths of fear and sorrow. I sat with another friend. I shook all over, inside and out, and nothing seemed clear to me.  I had no answers. My hope felt hollow. With weak words I said, “I am having a hard time even believing that God will make something good out of this. I can’t even pray.”

She held my hand, grabbed hold of my heart and said, “You don’t need to pray right now, I am doing that for you.  I know that you are weary and that your pain is great.  Just rest.  Let me be the one who prays.” She wrapped her arms around me, and we both cried. ” I will also do the believing for you. I will stand on His promises, holding you up.”

I will never forget the power of my dear friend’s prayers and her willingness to stand strong for me, when I could not stand or speak.  It stirs me to tears, even right now, as  I remember  God’s love flowing through her, knowing that she was determined to pray for me. I was weary and weak, but she was strong. She was strong not because she knew all the answers, or even one of them at that point, but because she knew the One who promised to be present, true, good and loving, all the time.

I am stirred to be that for my other friend today, even when I cannot be close to her physically. I am praying for her, believing the promises for her, holding her heart high knowing that God will care for her and meet her every need.

He did for me. I trust He will for her, too.  As for today, I will drop her a gift and write her a note, but most importantly, I will pray.

"Please Wait"

In the wet and wonder of a water park, my daughter signaled to my friend to bend down. “My mom is read-icted to the bible” she whispered in her ear.

“What did you say?” my friend asked, uncertain if she understood. “My mom is read-icted to the bible.”

My friend shared this story with me later that day. We giggled about it. Not addicted to the bible, but read-icted. Very clever. Mostly, I was surprised and delighted that this was what my daughter thought about me and felt like she needed to share with my friend.

Later that week, in a moment of solitude, my daughter announced to me that now she was “addicted” to prayer. She said that she prayed all the time, and in fact, I noticed her stopping frequently during the day, closing her eyes and whispering prayers heavenward. She prays simple prayers. Desiring prayers. Needful prayers. Sweet prayers. She prays for rain, and for rain to stop. She prays for letters in the mail and for blueberries at the store. She prays for safety when we are in the car and she prays for others to be happy.

This morning she was playing the computer while I was having my quiet time and reading my bible. I noticed that she was hanging upside down off the couch, head hung low, and whispering.

“What are you doing, dear?” I asked.

“Praying. I’m praying that the “please wait” sign would be gone so I can play the program I want to play. I am praying that God would hurry it up so I would not have to wait” she said, with a smile. “I like to pray for everything. Oh. There it goes. It doesn’t say “please wait” anymore. It’s ready for me!”

I smiled. I had prayed a prayer or two (or hundred) for the “please wait” sign to be removed, too. But, unlike the quick answer to prayer that my daughter experienced, God is still asking me to wait. His answer to my prayer remains, “Not yet. Please wait … still.”

Lamentations 3:25-26 says, “The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.”

Dear reader, perhaps God has you in a waiting period -- waiting to see what He has planned for you and/or waiting for what you are to do. Wait quietly. Wait confidently. Wait with great strength, for waiting is not weakness. Wait with hope. And while you wait, pray and seek Him, diligently, trusting Him for the plans He has for you, for He is good to those whose hope is in Him and He will deliver you.

A "Swimming Lessons" Lesson

I heard the enthusiastic swim instructor's voice bounce off the water, “Now we are going to work on our Elementary Back Stroke.”

I did not need to hear my youngest daughter’s voice. Her face and body language said it all. Across the pool, I could distinguish tears from pool water, running down her face. Her brow was furrowed, her shoulders hunched and her hands cupped and lifted up out the water. She was sure to be saying “But I don’t know how to do that stroke!”

The instructor, with a tender smile and a hug, gently plucked her out of the pool and placed her on the rim. She demonstrated to my daughter how to move her arms and legs. My daughter’s strain melted into a smile, as she jumped in to the pool to try it for herself, and all was well again in Level 3 swim lessons at our local pool.

I don’t know about you, but I can relate to how my daughter felt. I’m going along, listening to the Lord, working on whatever He has for me for the moment, and then I find myself up against something that I have no idea how to handle. I cry out “Help! But I don’t know how to do this new challenge!” There are challenges like holding on to a slippery hope, or speaking the truth even when the other person is not willing to listen, or believing that God has a future for me, when it seems as if all looks like a murky abyss, or dealing with memories that had been put aside, only to now, again rear their heinous head.

“Help, God! I don’t know how to do this one! I've been working hard on these other issues, but I wasn’t expecting this one, and now what do I do!”

And then with the gentleness that only God possesses, He lifts us up and sets us down, and begins to teach us the way in which we can handle the challenge before us. When we seek Him, we will find the way, and He will show us. This I know to be true. It is part of my story with God that I can attest to, but when I am caught off guard, I have to stop and even remind myself.

My two older kids are at camp this week. I was trying to memorize the verse that they were working on yesterday, when I witnessed this little interaction with my daughter and her swim instructor – evidence of God at work, again.

Jeremiah 6:16 says, (when you don’t know what to do …) “This is what the Lord says: ‘Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Dear reader, are you at a crossroads? Have you come upon a time of choice and decision? Are you faced with a new dilemma or a reminder of an old one that you need to process through and deal with? This is what the Lord says, seek Him. Seek Him in prayer. Seek Him through His Word, the Bible. Seek Him through the wisdom of those who also love Him. Stand and look around and ask Him to show you the path of truth that you are to walk in. His path is the “tried and true” way. It is the good way.

God will show you, and when He does, He asks us to walk in the way that He reveals to us. It was scary for my daughter to have to jump back in the water and try the “new” stroke that her teacher taught her. It can be scary for us to step out and do what God is asking us to do as well, but He is faithful and it is in seeking and obeying Him that we will find rest for our souls. That’s a promise.

As For Me, It Is Good To Be Near God

My nine your old son shuffled in to the room.

"Mom, I really need to talk to you. I had a really bad day at school and I'm scared."

We sat down on the couch and he shared, near to tears, "We talked about the digestive system today in science class. I'm really scared that I'm going to have appendicitis and it's going to rupture and I'm going to die. Like, what if I'm at school and suddenly I get pain and there is not time for me to get to the hospital. I'm really scared, Mom."

I tried to calm his fears. I talked to him about how appendicitis doesn't happen very often, but when it does it usually happens very gradually. I told him about the signs and the symptoms. I reassured him that it rarely ruptures, and that even if it did, there are antibiotics now to help people.

He still worried. As the hours went by, he brought it up from time to time. Over dinner he talked about it. On a walk with the dog he talked about. Even after he went to bed, he talked about it.

Finally, I said to him, "Honey, do you want me just to hold you? Maybe that would help?"

He sighed, "I think that is what I need, Mom. I'm sure glad that God gave me a mom who used to be a Physician Assistant who knows alot about things like this and can comfort me." And shortly after that, he fell asleep.

Usually when God is trying to tell me something, he sets it up in different circumstances. I had just posted Psalm 73:28 on the side bar of the blog days before, the speaker spoke on Psalm 73 at bible study yesterday, and then I had this sweet interaction with my son.

Psalm 73:28 says, "But for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds."

As I tried to encourage my son, I realized that I was much like him. I can have fears, especially during times of difficulty, when I am worn down and weary. There are so many uncertainties. I can become fearful and then I think on it, and think on it, and think on it. Finally, I remember that what is best for me is to be near God. And so like a little child, I draw away from the hustle and bustle, and draw near to God. With my warm fleece blanket, my bible and my journal, I snuggle in next to my Father in heaven and allow Him to hold me.

I realized that, because I had some knowledge, I could share with my son the truth about appendicitis. Because I had seen many people with the infection, I could assure him of the outcome. And because I love him very much, I could comfort him with my love.

This is how it is for us with God. He gives us truth, assurance and comfort. Our Father is a Sovereign Lord. He knows everything. Because of this, I can trust that He will show me the truth when I seek Him, and He will assure me in the process of His care for me, and His good and perfect plan. And because I am a child of God, I know that He loves me. He comforts me. He is my safe place of rest - my refuge.

Dear reader, my prayer is that you will know the gentle, tender touch of God, as you draw near to Him. I pray that you will know the truth and be assured through His Word and through prayer of His care and plan for you. I pray that you will know the comfort of his loving arms that hold you tight. Our all knowing God is in control of all things. We can depend on Him and not fear, because He truly is our refuge, and there we can rest.

Before I Could Even Ask ... God Answered

I got up at 5:30AM yesterday, and woke my oldest up to get ready. Made coffee. Let the dog out. Ate breakfast and drove my son to the high school for an event. Drove back home. Read my bible. Spent time with the Lord while the other children still slept. Researched grape vines and pruning. Wrote in my journal. Kids began to trickle down. Made breakfast. Answered a couple of e-mails. Took the dog for a walk and worked on (still!) heeling. Cleaned the kitchen, again. Did a load of laundry. Tried to organize the laundry room. Gathered up the kids to go to a flag football game of my youngest son. Soaked up some sun at the football game, talked with some friends and watched him play. Piled our stuff and ourselves back in to the car. Talked about what we would have for lunch and the long list of things we wanted to do during the day. Put the key in the ignition and - - - - - nothing.

I turned the key in the ignition once, twice, three times. Silence. But before I could even get the words AAA or On-Star out of my mouth, a man was standing in front of my car.

"Did you need me to help you? Sounds like your battery is dead. I can just turn around here and hook up the jumper cables."

"Really?" I thought to myself. Just like that? No calling for help? No sitting around for who knows how long waiting for road side assistance? Things usually don't come this easy!

I was thrilled. I popped the hood. The man, with his family, turned his car around, hooked up the cables, and I kid you not, within 4 minutes from figuring out my battery was dead, I was on the road again.

I couldn't believe it! Such quick response. I did not even have time to ask the Lord for help.

Through out the day the Lord brought a couple things to mind regarding this incidence, as simple as it was. They were just the things that I needed to be reminded of.

First of all, our Father in heaven knows what we need before we even ask (Matthew 6:8). Now, of course, that does not mean that we do not need to ever ask, it just means that He knows it all. Spending time with God in prayer is a vital part of our Christian faith, but I needed to remember that God is in control of all things, even when I don't have a chance to ask. He is ready at the rescue, providing just what I need, and just whom I need.

Secondly, I was encouraged to recall that even when I can't ask or don't ask, that there is Someone who is interceding on my part. Romans 8:26 says " ... the Spirit helps us in our weaknesses, for we do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express."

I have been feeling pretty worn down lately. I keep trying to focus on the Lord and resting in Him, but sometimes, I must admit that due to lack of wisdom or lack of energy, I don't even know what to ask for amidst my trial. My battery feels dead.

The paraphrase the message puts Romans 8:26 this way. "...the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.

Dear reader, what a blessed relief and assurance. Who knows how many times God answers the prayer of the Spirit when we have not even had a chance to mouth, let alone think, the words of our hearts. Sometimes, our only words may seem more like groanings and moanings let out from our pain; even these are used.

God really does have us covered and cares for us so tenderly. His timing is always perfect. At times He responds with a rapid response technique, even before we ask, and other times, His answers seem long in their coming. We can be confident though that in all things He is at work, and He loves us with an unfailing love.

Children of the Son

"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." Matthew 7:13-14

This is the verse that is written on the bottom of the painting that graces my kitchen and is shared with you in the header at the top of this page. Titled Children of the Son, it is very special to me, as my 75 year old friend, Mary, an impressionist painter, created it for me. The oil painting is very large, set in an ornate antique gold frame. It is of my five children, walking on the narrow path through a field of sunflowers (my favorite!), making their way to a church, that represents the Lord Jesus.

Mary is truly a remarkable woman of God. The Lord has used the suffering in Mary's life that He has asked her to bear, to create beautiful pieces of art. All of them are given a scripture verse, and are painted in prayer and an awareness of what God would want her to do, to glorify Him best. Mary has walked through many valleys. Her 4 month old son died in a car accident, and then years later, her only remaining child, a daughter, died of cancer. This summer, Mary was widowed. She knows what it is to suffer and struggle, but she shines with the love of the Lord and encourages me daily by praying for me and reminding me of God's truth.

As I mentioned, it represents my five children and their walk with the Lord. As a mom, it reminds me to encourage my children, to walk with the Lord, along the narrow path, trusting Him alone. As a woman, it reminds me also, of the same, during times of prosperity and times of adversity. I think that we sometimes forget, that in fact, it is a narrow road, with a small gate, that we must walk on. In the painting, the road is broad and the gate wide, that leads to where we do not want to go. But the narrow road is the one that we must stay on to experience the fullness of life that we have in Jesus. It is not easy to stay on the narrow road. It is less defined to the naked eye, and we must pray and trust the Lord to reveal each step to us. We know that it is difficult, because if it was easy, many would find it, but God's Word tells us that only a few find it.

To stay on the narrow road requires alot of faith, perseverance, endurance, wisdom and prayer. We must seek the Lord daily, accept the paths that He is asking us to walk in, and then trust Him for the direction and the end point.

As we come in to the New Year, my hope for all of us is that we would persevere in seeking the narrow road, and not give up and walk without hope and purpose on the wide road. I know that Jesus will meet us on the road that He has asked us to walk, no matter how weak or weary we may be.

"You have made known to me the paths of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence." Acts 2:28. May you experience joy in the Lord Jesus this New Year, as you walk closely with Him, in all circumstances, even the darkest and most painful.