As I drove down the highway this morning, the rising sun rested over my left shoulder and storm clouds percolated over my right shoulder. The contrast was dramatic in the Spring sky, mimicking the drama going on in my own heart.
“I’m just not up for today,” I murmured aloud to myself.
What I was really saying was, "I’m just not up for myself, today."
And at the expense of you, my dear reader, thinking that I am an old curmudgeon walking down Humbug Street, I gotta tell you, I'm plain old down in the dumps today (-- or down ON the dumps as my youngest child would say).
Covered with the trash of my own negative self-talk, the garbage clings to my weary heart.
And although I am trying to look for the new growth, quite frankly, I’m stuck in the mire of my own junk.
I’ve contemplated sitting here in the stink, letting it permeate even deeper in to my soul – trying to figure out what I should DO, but I was not – am not -- enjoying it. At all.
And so, I’m choosing to remember and focus on the Lord’s love for Me, despite how I am feeling or what my circumstances may be – or not be – He loves me.
And He loves you, too.
Perhaps you’re feeling a little “humbugish” today?
May I pray for both of us?
Some days are really stinky. I know you know that, and yet, you have things for us in this day – things to bless us and things for us to bless others. Help us, Lord to see your grace in this day, even when we feel down in the dumps. Thank you for loving us and for showing us that love. Help us to truly have eyes to see and ears to hear so that we do not miss you, even on – maybe even more so on – a day that is gray.