The Raw Cry of My Heart and My Hope

I’ll be the first to say, there is a lot I don’t know or understand about life and how God works and why there is so much suffering and sorrow and brokenness in the world.

And if I’m not careful, I can feel my heart start to implode and fold upon itself in to a little package of despair.

I’ve been resisting the urge to let it do just that.

From time to time, in the aftermath of hearing about the tragedy in Newton, Connecticut, and hearing the stories from people I know well (and not so well) about the struggles in their own lives, I have felt the creases start to form and my heart quiver.

And I look Heavenward and wonder about God’s goodness and His love and His control and His justice and His peace and His care.

And sometimes, I find myself not knowing what to do with all this sorrowful, sickening stuff.

Until a few days ago … and this is where I am resting my weary head, on an image that I believe the Lord gave me to settle my anxious heart.

I see a school with large wooden doors.  They swing open wide and young children tumble out, running and skipping and jumping and singing and smiling and laughing.

They run down the steps together, looking forward, eager.

And then I see what they are running towards – Who they are running towards.

Jesus.

And He is crouched down, eye to eye with the children.  A great big smile, radiant across His face, shines. His strong, gentle arms are stretched out wide. He is leaning a bit forward, with head cocked ever so slightly to one side, with a look of welcome and excitement that beckons the children on.

And I hear His deep, kind voice speak clearly and comfortingly, “Come on! I’m right here! Everything is going to be great.  You’re safe now. You’re Home.  Come, let’s go play!”

And the children barrel in to His arms, and the picture freezes in my mind as tears barrel down my face.

I don’t know a lot, but I do know this.  What happened in Newton, Connectictut is incomprehensible, but there is Hope.

Jesus is alive, and He is crazy in love with those kids and the ones who risked their lives, and He’s crazy about you and about me.

And when the days grow dark and I can’t make sense of anything, I see Jesus, and He’s saying to them and to me and to you, “We’re good! I’m here!  Everything is going be great! Come, crawl in to My arms, and take heart.  I love you.”